Movin' on...a really big loser

Good morning! We officially began our BL contest last night, but had to be weighed and measured first. I was honestly taken back when I saw that I did not gain the weight back from last year's loss. In fact, I stayed the same. You could have knocked me out with a one pound weight while I stood on the scale with my eyes partly closed and almost all of my clothes off (they add extra pounds to the scale). I cannot offer any advice on how to do this since I had no clue since I have absolutely no willpower.

Yesterday afternoon, Tink knocked a pizzelle out of my hands. Since she is my weight loss partner, I sort of agreed with her passion. However, last night, I smelled potato chips on her breath! Yep! Busted! Where did you get those chips?

I cleaned the house out of all junk type foods (except pizzelles. Tink made a batch for Betty on Sunday and we had a few leftover). Dang, I have to check her car for contraband. After all, the prizes for the weight loss is cash!

Yes, I said cash....what would I do with this cash prize?

Well.....

fade to black.....

Last week, we received a bid on the landscaping for the southern house. We need trees removed and replanted. We also need sod, plants, and for the place to be overhauled. We also need a new driveway, stairs, and the pool filled in. My secret desire is to have a firepit and little waterfall. Too much? Well.......

The bid came in. I landed on the floor without a pillow when I saw the estimate. Folks, the bid was more than what I make in a year as a full time tenured professor. Where did I go wrong in life? All of this extra education and I should have gone into the landscaping business in the south.

Do I give up my firepit? Waterfall? Driveway? plants? Trees? Eating?

Naturally, this bid has to be addressed because we could feed a tiny impoverished nation for this amount of money and have left over cash to buy Lotto tickets. Dad and I have to have a serous talk with the landscaper and let him know that we are not from Mayberry and understand that he is not planting a money tree in the backyard. I would take care of things myself (right), if there were no snakes, but honestly, I am a coward. Just the thought of a poisonous snake or two gives me a shiver up my spine and renders me motionless.......

Fade to black......

A long time ago....and I mean a loooong time ago, Dad, Big Sis, Big M and I went to the Grand Canyon. It was beautiful. We stupidly decided to walk to the Colorado River not knowing that there would not be a McDonalds or Burger King along the path to buy beverages and maybe some chicken nuggets. Anyway, we ran out of water one mile into our 7 mile hike. Stupid, yes?

As we continued toward the river, we stopped moving downhill and were on flat ground with cacti and tumbleweeds. We were dragging but would not give up until we got to our destination.....Then I heard it......sssssss.....rattle rattle.....Hey, I watched those animal Disney shows and Mutual of Omaha shows on TV. I knew what those sounds meant. You don't need a PhD to figure that one out. Suddenly, I had a burst of energy and ran for my life in a zig zag manner.

Afterall, doing my research via television, I knew that you can outrun a snake if you run zig zag rather than in a line. So, thre I scampered....zigging and zagging....zagging and zigging...expending whatever fluids I had left in my body. We made it to the Colorado....looked at it and started back. As we trudged through the flat portion again, my energy returned and I ran again....looking like I had had a box of wine before the journey.

Dad, Big Sis and Big M laughed so hard. They would have wet their pants from laughing if they had not bee so dehydrated. Anyway, we pulled ourselves to the top of the mountain trying to flag down a helicopter to pick us up. None stopped. We were on our own....As you probably figured out, we made it to the top again and vowed never...and I mean never...will we try such a challenge again without a donkey to get us down and up again.

Back to the trees and plants....Honestly, I have no clue what to do but cut out the diamond encrusted palm trees .....Stay tuned.....as bids come in, this is going to get even more interesting.....Let's see, sofa change....selling blood....sell my hair.....take the bus to work....eat Cheerios for breakfast, lunch, and dinner....that's all I have. Time to consult Suzie Orman, right?

Gotta run. We have step class this morning and I am going to have to catapult Tink out of bed.

Peace~

Movin on back north

Good morning! I have been MIA for the past two days recovering from the long ride home on Thursday. We left at 4 am and drove until we needed gas for the car....then continued some more. All in all, it took about 10.5 hours to make the trip back north. Once home, I had to address work related issues and sign up for the Biggest Loser with Tink. She swears that we are going to win. I do not know if I have the willpower two years in a row to lose and sculpt. She is going to have to motivate me. Of course, I my progress has been derailed.....

On to what's new. Well, yesterday, the big kid got his first acceptance to law school. That's right....law school. if you are a regular reader, you know that I have always doubted his sincerity when he said that he wanted to go to law school. Never in a million years did I think that my athlete would want more school. My vision of his future had nothing to do with post baccalaureate education. But I kept my mouth shut and watched. And boy, did he prove me wrong. He took a LSAT prep class and  the LSAT's twice, wrote countless essays, and applied to (as of today) one law school. Boom! Yesterday, he received the letter AND a scholarship that had the word "merit" in it!

Yes, that is correct. My little boy, who does not read directions and put Tink's desk together backwards, received a merit scholarship from a law school. Boy, has my paradigm shifted as did the earth off its axis. Now, I will continue to sit back and keep my thoughts to myself.

On to an essay that he is currently writing. We have all been rejected, right? Come on...admit it....you have been rejected once or twice. Well, I know that I hold the record in rejections. Check out the Guinness Book of World Records under "rejections" and you will see my face. Anyway, the big kid would LOVE to attend law school at dad, Big M's and my alma mater. He was raised with a love of blue and white and cannot think of anywhere else he would like to go. However......fade to black....

Six years ago, the baseball coach felt that he was not blue and white material and rejected him. Ouch. That hurt.

After making the team at the big school in the mountains, he had the opportunity to pitch against blue and white. Boom! Yep, he dismantled them......

The following year, he had a torn groin and was pitching on one leg. Bam! he took them down again with an all time low fast ball of 78 mph (he could not land with the groin and hip, so he threw from his arm rather than body). Once again.....blue and white go down.

Now, he knows that an acceptance to blue and white law school is a long shot if not a miracle, so he is writing an essay that will either place him on a pedestal with a full ride or be banned from campus and football games forever. In this essay, he is writing about his love for blue and white, his legacy, their chance to take him for the baseball team (they had the first shot) and the coach's rejection of his abilities. He segues into how he destroyed them on the mound proving to them that they made a mistake. Lastly, he shares that he does not want them to make another mistake and is giving them a second shot.

Arrogant? Or dare I say, 'brilliant"?

I am going with the brilliant part for two reasons. First, he has nothing to lose. Second, since he has nothing to lose,

He has to capture their attention with an outrageous essay. I believe his tactic may work. If it does, I will sit back and marvel at how a competitive mind can be one of the best assets in life. If he does not get in, I will sit back and say, "hey, you gave it a shot." After all, these admissions officers receive the same letter for each applicant. "I want to change the world...be an advocate for the downtrodden...and so on and so on...."  How many law schools receive a letter that says, "please don't reject me twice, 'cause I can prove you wrong again."?


And so, the quest toward a law degree continues while Tink sleeps through our first work out. Can anyone say "epic fail?"

As far as my diet derailment is concerned, it is the Big Kid's fault. When he was accepted in law school, we had to celebrate....that's right. Usually we celebrate with cake, but since he loves pecan pie more than his car, I picked up a pie...then proceeded to congratulate him at dinner and polish off two pieces. Yep, the road to weight loss and sculpting has been officially derailed less than 24 hours after I began.

Got to waddle to boot camp.

Peace!

Faucets and fixtures

Good morning! It's still a bit wet here as our work-related visit comes to an end. Tomorrow Tink and I leave before dawn to travel up I 95. We have to be home in time for our Biggest Loser kick off meeting.

That's right. Tink and I are going to work together as a team to lose some weight. Before this happens, I am going to express that each added pound was added on due to my love of cannolis and Christmas cookies.

I am not going to complain because I made the decision to eat. No one forced me to open my mouth, chew, and swallow.

 Often people lose weight when stressed. I am the opposite. I eat. That's it. So now....back to work in the Biggest Loser contest, Hopefully, Tink and I will not kill each other. She had already begun inspecting what I eat and drink. It's like having a electric dog collar on my neck every time I reach for anything but a banana. This should be interesting.

So, how are things in Mayberry?

As you know, we have to select doors yesterday. Yep, we went to a door store. What did we see? uh, doors, right. Every kind of door imaginable. It took an hour to select the doors because we had no clue what to look for except we needed to close off the world from the bathrooms and bedrooms. We chose the doors.

Next, we ran to the faucet and fixture store. That's right. Faucets and fixtures. In other words, how do we want to turn the sinks on when we wash our hands? This turned out to be a major project since we had already been to this store and overspent by $$$$$. We had to whittle the selections down significantly and so we did. 


Before that I kept the non negotiables such as the toilet with the night light, tub with the jets and heated back (ahhhhh), and kitchen faucet that you can turn on with the wave of your hand. Everything else could be made of sticks and stone, but who does not want a
magic faucet in the kitchen? Mind you, I am a bit of a germ phobe which is an understatement. Therefore, the hands free faucet keeps the nasty germs away from the handles and counter tops. 

You will thank me  some day for this...I think.....or not....

After faucets and fixtures, we were off to light fixtures. This was a bit tougher since we did not bring the plans with dimensions, So it was a wasted trip. However, I confirmed something that I have known since I was a junior in college....that is, dad and I are two different people with two distinctly if not polar opposite senses of style. He is linear. I am all over the place. I like the unique. He is more of a straight line person which can lead to some not-so-heated negotiations on what type of fixture to place over the table of twelve. I generally acquiesce on certain things like faucets and fixtures. However, when it comes to lights and colors,



I have to be a bit more passionate as I convince him that grey is not brown and silver can be a neutral. He is color blind and will occasionally admit it.

The last errand was to the electronic specialist. Dad wants a smart house. Is that a dig against me? Nope (I don't think so). He wants to control everything through a cell phone or iPad. And so, our techie showed us what is possible. 

That is, television, lights, music, alarm,outside and inside cameras, heat, air conditioning,  window shades, and doors can be controlled with the iPad from anywhere in the world, I kid you not. This is un-bee-lee-vable! Yet, I know, that as we get excited about our iPads, we will pay a hefty price for automation. Maybe the house will be smarter than we are.



What if it decides not to open to doors? Turn on the fans or television? What sold me was the 24/7 tech support assistance that we could have. This means everything to me since we had a smart television and when I finally tried to watch a movie, the screen went blank.  

As I called the former tech support people, I waited, spoke to them, and was treated as if I was a ten year old...I guess technologically speaking, I am. Yet, I do not like the condescension when I am paying someone to tell me how to reboot the not so smart television.


Today, we visit with the architect and lighting specialist again. This time we will be equipped with the plans. Tomorrow, dad will meet with Barney and techie. he will also speak with the HVAC specialists since the house has never been balanced when it comes to heating and cooling. It is either hot in one room (like where you would want to wear a bathing suit rather than shorts) or freezing like a meat locker in the next room.



This has not been an easy process as we are working from miles and miles away. I don't know what is going to happen in the future but something tells me that one of us is going to have lots of frequent flyer miles. Also, dad starts his uber-busy tax season.


So, it all comes down to setting up the sub contractors with the plans and try to keep an eye on things long distant. What happens next? Who knows.

All I know is that if everything goes according to plans (which it won't), this will be a great place for family and friends to gather. If not, I will have several holes in my gut as the acid gnaws against my stomach lining. Looking ahead, that could hurt!

OK, I gotta get some work done before everyone gets out of bed.

Peace!

PS: I miss the Christmas lights and trees. How did the holiday go by so fast?

Movin on.....Doors and trees

Happy New Year! It's a rainy southern day as  I tried to sneak out of the room early to write. You see, since the house has been destroyed, we are stuck in this fancy inn. Am I complaining? I shouldn't be since it is first class accommodations. After all, they have butlers greet me every time I walk into the lobby. But, there is a significant lack of privacy which I miss especially in the morning when I love writing in my pajamas. It would not look good if one of the butlers would be heard saying "Oh good morning, Mrs. BPM, your faded Illinois tee shirt and old pajama bottoms are lovely today. In fact, they go beautifully with your blood shot eyes and unkempt appearance." I don't know about you, but I prefer to keep my blood shot eyes and unkempt appearance to myself before sharing it with the world.

Truly, this inn is terrific, but there is no place like a home. My comfort level has dropped significantly as we our stays increase.




By the way, the insurance company is paying for this place. I could never afford it unless I checked the change under the sofa cushions here. By the way, no one is in the lobby and there is a big cushy sofa here. Should I look to see if any change drops? Dare I?



I pause...look around...and lift up the cushion closest to me...Mission accomplished.

There is no fallen change under the inn cushions just a candy wrapper....Rats...And I was almost caught by a butler. Sheepishly, I puffed the pillows to look like I was straightening them out.....I need a life....

OK, So, what is going on with the house and Barney? Welll....

Barney finally sent a contract yesterday. Even my unaware eye could see that it came off the internet and was totally wrong. Barney wants a significant amount of money wired to him each month to pay for expenses that he might not have.



Now, let's be clear....BP Grandma (who has a terrible cold...get better, ma) did not raise a fool...a flake, perhaps...but not a fool.



"Barney, this contract does not make sense. You are to be sent money upfront then as bills arise PLUS 15%. I won't be signing this one....." And so, life in Mayberry continues as we can't even get the contract worked out.



Today the building plans go before the board in the community for approval.It has taken 9 months and uber $$ to get them done. Originally, we wanted to open up the kitchen and family room to maximize space for people to gather....then it happened.....the original architect's son, who is also an architect took a walk around the house sand began to make suggestions...like a loft for more bedroom space....I like it....

Then he went into the living room....let's bump this out for better vision of your gorgeous view....OK, this seems cool.....

want another fireplace? Sure, who doesn't?



How about a firepit? Uh, yeah.....

This eating section is small....if we add space, you can fit at least 12 people....you say, 12? well, that seems like a wonderful idea.

On to the upstairs....let's add a balcony and deck....then we can increase space in the master bedroom and add a media room. A media room and balcony, you say? Go for it....$$$..

Last idea....Tink's bedroom has to be moved if you want a media room and balcony. Then move it sir. SSSSSSSSS

Ooops....totally forgot....the HVAC system and roof need replacing....SSSSSSSSS

Ten trees have to be taken done and replaced SSSSS


Now, mind, you....Hurricane Matthew helped with tree removal and added a skylight in the roof with a large tree branch that hit it. Oh yeah...the landscaping needs revamping too. Let's add a patio and waterfall....



Now you can see why I crave a bit of privacy in the morning. I need to it organize, caffeinate, and prepare to do battle in Mayberry. Each project has a different project manager who will be named at a later date. Also, we are controlling this project from 800 miles away which means several day trips back to Mayberry to work with vendors. So far, our first invoice is $$$$ over budget. This is pretty much and "ouch, that smarts...." does that mean that we cannot have our toilet with the night light? Don't make fun of me, but if you saw this toilet, you would want it too. Also, there is a way to heat the seat. Yes, in this day of poverty, homelessness, and hunger, I am actually considering a heated toilet seat. This is terrible...yet intriguing. If I have extra money, it should go to the poor....yet.....it's not that expensive when you consider the joy the 12 people who sit at my kitchen table will have.....Am I wrong? Don't answer. I already feel the pangs of guilt.

OK, off to pick out doors....yes, I said doors.



Peace!

Movin On

Happy New Year to all readers! BP mom has moved on. In fact, I call the new blog "Movin' on'. Here is the link. I hope that you enjoy the new stories as I move on to my next phase of life...which I have not figured out yet.

Peace!