Closing the waist band

Good morning! it's a soupy day and I am trying to find something in the closet that is appropriate for class that is not too tight. It's not that I buy those skin tight clothes, it's the fact that my skin has grown in the past few months with the help of Mr. Merlot and Mrs. Ice Cream.



Anyway, I did play paddle yesterday but first put a brace on my left knee and right arm. I looked like I was just released from the orthopedic unit.



With my sunglasses, cap, and sneakers, I looked like a weekend warrior as I grabbed the paddle and said: "let's go!" Yeah...and we went as I hit several balls over the fence. Uh huh....no control....as coach politely mentioned the reason for my injuries was the poor form that I displayed...uh huh....I didn't want to tell her that my arm hurt because I injured it in yoga. I can't believe it myself. I would rather say: "My right arm was injured in a fall that I took when  I caught a child jumping from a burning building." How does that sound? Believable?



How about...."I injured the right arm when I dove in front of a SEPTA bus as a granny fell underneath the wheels?" No?



"I had to stop traffic because a bunny hopped into the middle of the intersection?"

"Would you believe I injured it while vacuuming the family room?" Note on this one, when we bought the new vacuum, my son has to show me how to start it.....

"The arm injury occurred when I disarmed a bandit in the bank...." Hmmmm....

OK, the truth...it's probably a Candy Crush injury. After all, I am on level 125. My resolve to quit in September went out the window.....

Nuff about me and my crumbling joints and bones....I heard briefly last night from the big kid. His finance professor gave the class a break after a two hour lecture. "Mom! I can't stannnnnnd it! It's so boring. Where's dad?" OK, let's consider this boring class. After all, you are minoring in business and finance is a tiny morsel of business, right? Wrong! Finance is business! Oye! Who helped him to choose a minor? Do you see me waving my right arm with the ice pack on it? Nope? It was not me who was consulted about this one. I already knew that he hated minutiae, therefore he would not like crunching numbers like his pop. So, it goes......

Now it's time to select that outfit that will allow for blood flow from my ankles to my core. Some of the waist bands are a challenge to close this week. I refuse to buy bigger clothes which is why I started the diet last week. It has actually worked, so now I can zip but not button....make sense?

Only if you wear my shoes.....sneakers...slippers...flip flops.....gotta run....gotta teach.....students are beckoning me.....Peace!

Bullpen Mom's Olympiad

Greetings! As you know, my bottom has been attached to the easy chair for the last ten days watching the Olympic games. Fortunately, I do not eat while watching television, but my muscles are starting to atrophy while watching the world's best table tennis players and professional US athletes beat up on third world nations.

One of the highlights have been the South African man who is running sprints. He does not have legs and uses prosthesis. This is what it is all about in my book. Not letting something like no legs stop a guy from competing. I respect his ability to not take no for an answer.

Another highlight has been the runners who have overcome great obstacles to train and train and train....all the athletes have given up so much to get there. I watched several runners "lapped" during the 10,000 M race. If it was me, they would have turned the lights out in the stadium and told me to lock up when I was done. Whew! No medal for me....

I also respect the swimming champion who did not kill his mother when she announced to the world that he was too busy to date so he has one night stands instead. If it was my son, he would have killed me. Conversely, if it was my son, I would have killed him. No one night stands....is that what he would want for his sister? Doubtful....so please treat women like individuals and respect them as you would want your mother and sisters to be respected. And Swimmer Mom...take my advice: "Shut up, sit down, and watch the games. Stop embarrassing your kid. You are giving all mothers who sit in the stands and watch their athletes a bad name."

More highlights include looking at the clothing especially the uniforms and sneakers. Believe it or not, the sneakers have captured my attention. During track and field, no one wore the traditional black cleats. There were bright yellow, orange, green, and gold. I watched the colorful sneakers spinning around the track. I have no idea who won. I think the guy with the bright yellow sneakers finished first. Is this a new trend? Last week I bought a new pair of tennis sneakers and they are grey with pink trim. Flashy, eh? Now I look especially menacing when I hit the ball into the net.

And so, I ponder.....after dedicating your entire life to one moment in time, is it important to win or more important to look good while losing? Only one person can win a gold medal. That means countless others like me are losers. Therefore, I contend that if you are going to lose, wear a very cool looking pair of sneakers. Also, make sure that your Ralph Lauren USA outfit is pressed and clean.

Keep in mind, while you are losing in front of a global audience, watch your mouth, 'cause we can read lips in our living rooms.  Would you want your sweet little granny who is watching you in her parlor with her girl friends to see that?

Remember, you not only represent your country, but your family is watching. Keep your potty mouth in check. It does not match your flashy sneakers.

Choking: A hazard among athletes

Good Morning! There is a great deal to do, so I have to keep this one short. Hope all is well....

The Olympics remain on the 'telly' as I have been addicted to the games. I had a Starbucks scone (very dry) for breakfast. Is that British enough? By the way, they are looking for barristas at my Starbucks. Too late for me to apply. I have to start classes at the end of this month.

Yesterday, I watched a tennis match in which the losing player double faulted the match point. Not only did I groan for him but I screamed at the guy. I hope that he heard me thousands of miles away. Was I angry with him? No! I felt his pain. Here he is in a tie break 12-11 and he hit two serves out and was eliminated. Poor guy. I consider this a major choke.

You know what a choke is....it is a slang term for when an athlete makes an unforced error due to anxiety or a mental letdown. I can only imagine that his coach had to talk him off the ledge last night. Buddy was standing next to me at the time and I told him that the double fault was like walking in the winning run in the World Series. This is not the way it is supposed to go. The opponent is supposed to dominate or win with talent. The loser is not supposed to fold and fall apart like a cheap suit.

Ok, here it comes.....for example....I was playing a tennis match at a higher level in which I am rated against clearly better players (on paper). We lost the first set easily and made adjustments during the second set and won it. Then we took a quick break and lost our momentum. As the opposing team won the match, we shook hands. One of the opposing players said to me: "I must have fallen asleep in the second set." My reply was: "Or something like that...." In other words, she was saying that there was no way that we should have gone into three sets and rather than thinking that we were worthy opponents, she was saying that she should not have relaxed. She did not acknowledge that we made adjustments and that the set win was a fluke. Now, talk about ego....

What about ego? Well, in competition, you gotta have it. Without an ego, then there would be no reason to get out there and lay it out on the court or field. A healthy ego can give a person the confidence to face competition. Just ask anyone who plays a sport. Sure, they love their game or exercise, but a person absolutely needs to understand that he or she can win the game at any time.

Buddy has a major ego. He needs it to get him through the rough and pressure-filled times. In fact, his ego is as big as Montana. This is a good thing. Only a person with complete confidence in their abilities has the courage to take the mound and fire fast balls over a tiny plate. He needs to understand that he can dominate. And he does. But it only comes with hard work.

Therefore, my parting words for the day are: "There is nothing beyond the reach of determination and hard work."

Go USA!