Friday, February 22, 2013

The remote control

Hello! It's Friday! Time to prepare for a weekend of NOT going to any baseball games. Oh no...what really want to read this one? OK, here we go.....

Someone once said to me: "life is a journey....not s sprint....don't try to rush it." Thanks for that piece of advice. I never forget it and never really liked the sentiment either. Why? OY! Why not? Someone is telling me not to be so intense. Relax. Enjoy these precious moments...they will be gone before you know it. Yes, all that is true for the good times. But the bad times? I would love to fast forward them or at least crawl up into a fetal position and close my eyes for a few days. And so I tried to wish these crazy low times away and hit the remote control to bypass the turmoil. Hmmm...but I am a big girl, so I tried to tackle it head on.....too vague? OK, here we go....

On Monday, there was a team meeting and the  head coach called out my son and told the group that he wants to see more passion like what Buddy had displayed last week. I guess being told to $%#YU(* was an  eye opener for the coach.

On Wednesday, the big kid swallowed his pride and went to speak with the pitching coach on his own. Let's rewind to Tuesday night, when he was depressed, low, and incredibly sad. "This place is not for me..." Oh shades of 'whoa is me....'   Finally, I had enough and said: "Get over it or do something."

The meeting with the coach went as expected. He gave him grief about his attitude...told him that he was arrogant and owed a number of people an apology. Then the leftie asked the coach for help since he cannot achieve his goals without him. As he sat in the office and was berated by the coach for his attitude and arrogance, he apologized, told the coach that he does not like to ask for help, is very independent, and somewhat self-centered. OK, in other words....he 'owned it'. Then the coach said that he would travel this week to Virginia.

Is it over? is what happened next. Yesterday the travel  list was posted. Buddy was on it, but one of his friends was not. Naturally, the non-traveler was peeved and blamed him for his removal from the list. Does anyone see a cohesive team here? Frankly, it starts at the top. The way that the list was distributed, taking the freshman as opposed to the upper classmen, has created a major chasm with the pitchers.

Pick up the remote, and hit the forward button to today. The weather in Virginia is awful and today's game has been postponed. Tomorrow's weather is not much better but they will try to play and on Sunday, there will be a double header. Tink and I are not going to travel this weekend for a number of reasons.

First, the weather is going to be soupy, drippy, and cold. There is no joy watching a game in the freezing rain while your player sits in the wet bullpen. Maybe he gets the call...but after last week's activities....probably not. Sunday's double header seems somewhat exciting....but I'll watch it at home. My son needs to handle his issues on his own. having his mom show up does not deliver a sign to the coaches that he is mature enough to handle his issues.

Once I was called a helicopter mom by a friend. This could not be farther from the truth. As a matter of fact, I listen, support, and show up when I am needed. But the kids have to find their own way and hopefully use me to help them to figure out what to do. I am not the decision maker here. They control their decisions. I have as much control over them as I do the weather.....Besides, they don't listen to me anyway...sound familiar?

Now what...well, I am sad that I won't be catching up with Blue Devil in Virginia but will make a plan to see her soon. I will watch the game's activities online this weekend and wait patiently for the big kid's number to be called to the mound. I will continue to support him but not give into the attitude or entitlement....although.....

I just finished reading Andre Agassi's biography. It was pretty compelling as the reader is taken on a journey into a champion's mind. Let's just say, that once I finished the book, I understood what it took to be the best in any line of work from tennis to education. No one stands in their way. The passion can be construed as arrogance. People will write and talk about you, but since they do not live in your mind, they can only speculate. Usually, they are wrong. And so, here we go again....

The season begins for bullpen mom as she sits by her computer and watches a screen that changes and updates the game's progress in what seems like a looong time. The usual questions will be asked: "When will he be put in? Why did he throw that pitch? what's going on with the slow shortstop...." and so on.

Ok, I think that I am ready....sad that I am not traveling, but sometimes, a son is better off if his mom does not show up in her SUV or helicopter.

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