I finally heard from the big kid last night as he checked in after a long weekend. It seems that he had missed a text message that was sent on Sunday night changing the lift time for the pitchers from 8 am to 7 am. By the time he got to the weight room, he was 15 minutes late and therefore had to do extra work as a punishment. Before he completed the activities, he called the coach to report his lateness. The coach screamed at him and used profanity. "Not to worry mom, it's my fault....."
My fault....my fault....does anyone ever warrant a verbal smackdown like that...especially when the kid is early to everything from practice to games to weight lifting.....heck...he was even born two weeks early....what the ^%#*& ?? The coaches know this, yet the head honcho needed to scream and belittle him. I don't know about you, but with all of this nastiness, I am positive that I could not live this life.
With that said, he also mentioned having 'words' with one of his team mates while they were out on Saturday night. I did not get the whole story, but apparently someone called him out for his arrogance. Sigh....
I remember where I was during this phone call....on the sofa in the family room while Tink worked on the dishes...Knowing that this was going to be a lengthy call, I was lying on my back and listening to his story about his nasty encounter with his team mate and uttered the words...
"Dude, if you are going to do this for a living, you have to develop a thicker skin." In other words, he cannot let what people say to his face or behind his back get to him. Because this is something that he cannot control.
If he lets anything that is not positive affect him, then he is going to question himself and doubt his abilities. And so, I wonder how a person can block out the negativity or fear.....
Perhaps he can sing show tunes in his head.....
Count to 100 in three's....
Think of pretty flowers on a spring day....
Listen to the birds tweeting....
Or do what a friend of mine is college advised me when I was afraid to do a speech. He said: "Hey, BPM, just pretend that their heads are blowing up in front of your eyes. Then you no longer are worried about what you are going to say. It will be a non issue...." Hmmm....that suggestion was never one that I embraced.
The same friend had another suggestion: "Hey, BPM, don't be nervous....just pretend that everyone is naked in front of you." Awww....that was a nasty suggestion especially since it was senior year in college and the students had gained more than their freshmen ten pounds. It was more like 20 or 30 pounds with the abundance of beer available in the dorms.
And so, there must be a way to block out the negatives and focus on the positives. I don't mean that a person should not listen to criticism, how does a person improve? But, the negative press or locker room words can impact a person's confidence especially when they do not know the entire story. Did you see the interview with Richard Sherman after the Seahawks win? He was crazed and calling out the other team's players. This is locker room stuff. Erin Andrews looked startled, but I will tell you that this is indicative of what is said in the locker room. We do not see this as fans, but the locker room is its own world and has its own rules and standards.
With that rationale, I am not going to say more about the coach's temper. I will chalk it up to the environment and butt out. If I say to the kid: "Hey, that stinks. He should not talk to my son that way. I will call him and give him a piece of my mind" I am not doing him a favor.
If I say: "Yell back at him! Call him a butt-head!" Then I am giving very bad advice since the coach is the king and he rules. Therefore, I listen, say 'tsk tsk' , and tell him to learn and move on. Let his pitching do the talking....and it will silence the haters....'cause remember...'the haters are gonna hate...'
Hey, it's better advice than pretending that their heads are blowing up in front of your eyes....or is it?
Have a nice day!
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