Saturday, September 8, 2012

Heartache and sorrow: Life lessons

Saturday! You know what Kelly Clarkson says? Wellll....she sings: "Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger...." Whew! That can be taken in a number of ways, right?

And so, I bring up the fabulous Ms. Clarkson to remind our former roomie, Angel, that life will get better and he will get to the other side of the chasm, stronger, wiser, stronger, and better....

Huh? What happened to Angel? Angel has suffered from what many of us has faced at least once or twice (OK...some more than twice...). He was dumped by Ms. Canada this week and the poor guy is devastated. Such a nice guy too....but sometimes girls in college do not want the nice guy. Perhaps she became a bit bored with a young man who would pick her up on dates, hold her hair back when she vomited after too much beer, or would admire her new tattoo. Maybe it is nothing that Angel did per se....she just needed to move on to the next guy. And move on she did. She obviously does not recognize how good she had it....

OK, I am doing the 'mom-thing' know what that is....why would anyone harm or not want to be with my baby? Granted, Angel is not my son, but I have great affection for him as one of my son's good friends. He is truly a funny, decent person who has taken my kid to church when he did not want to go. Also, he loves my cupcakes! What is there not to like about this kid? Nada...from a mom's perspective.

Therefore, I will spew some of the wisdom that I have learned over the years to help our com-padre to feel a twinge it comes:

Angel, you are a great guy. She obviously needs a different kind of guy. You deserve better. There are so many young women out there who would love to meet a nice person like you. Will this pep talk work? Absolutely not.....So here are the real facts....

1. She's crazy
2. You are so much better off without someone who doesn't love you like you deserve to be loved
3. Love should not be so difficult. Sure, you can fight and bicker....but at the end of the day, you come back together and work things out.
4. It's gonna hurt for a long time....can anyone spell "months"?
5. Love comes when you do not search for it.
6. Love is not what you expect. it's not like the movies or television. It's real and often ugly. There are no serenades, bouquets of flowers each day, or quiet afternoons walking through the park. Love is crazy, unpredictable, uncertain, and hurtful. It can damage and leave a hole in your heart BUT
7. Once you find someone that clicks with you, there is nothing like it. You will find that there is a comfort knowing that someone loves you more than them self. Someone is there to pick up the dirty socks, wash the underwear, pick the weeds, and make a lousy dinner as you smile and say that Top Chef could not have made it any better....
8. When love really comes, she will say that you are the most handsome and funniest guy in the world. She will laugh at your lame jokes and cry when you are sad. She will be your go-to girl when you strike out or hit a home run.
9. She will always cheer for you and rise out of bed in the middle of the night to take you to the airport.
10. Lastly, your soul mate will be just that...a girl who cannot live without you and sees the goodness in you. You can be yourself which means that you can be cranky, angry, happy, and sad around her without her pulling the plug in the relationship.
It can and will happen....don't look for it now. Heal...hang out with the on school and baseball....take in a movie or two.....get enough sleep....and let yourself feel sad. But once the raw emotion ends, it will be time to move forward and not look do I know this? Oye! When I write my book, I will share the ups and downs of life with you....until then, just know...I speak the truth and my readers know it too.....

Have a wonderful day.....

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