Good morning! Or is it? Maybe....not sure....the big kid is leaving for college today and for some reason the faucet of tears has been flowing. It's crazy. We have been doing this for years, but for some reason, this time seems so permanent. He has grown into the young man that I wanted to see. he is polite, kind, respectful, funny, intelligent, and self deprecating. This is all good. Yet, he has to leave. I know it. But for some reason, the tears are flowing like a leaky hose. I cannot stop them. it's not like sobbing, boo hoo tears. It's just down the face...drip...drip...drip. I cannot stop them. Even if I think about something else .....guided imagery....exercise...work...nothing...nada...they keep coming. Now I am worried that I am going to be dehydrated since I am losing so much fluid. My eyes look like I have not slept for days...gotta try to Preparation H to decrease the puffiness before going to work today.
Why am I sad? Ahhh...good byes always are tough for me. Especially after spending such a great deal of time together over the last few weeks shopping and planning the apartment, dinners, and activities. I wish that I could stop, but even my computer keyboard is wet right now and I am afraid that I will electrocute myself. I can see the headlines....."BP mom shocked by her own tears...." OK, this is crazy. It has to stop. But he leaves today after I go to work. AND I am going to campus on Monday to drop off the sofa. So, what's up with mom? I wish I knew....so let's consider other options.
Why would a momma cry knowing that her child is living his dream? Actually there is no reason for this....
Why would a momma cry when her senior in college son leaves to finish his degree? It's not like he is going to the Amazon to observe the chimps.
Why would a momma cry when her child is evolving into a wonderful person who has to leave home? After all, do I want him to live in my basement and eat bags of Doritos when he is 30?
It's crazy and I have no answers. So, I will let the tears flow since I cannot stop them. And move on to the fall activities like looking forward to football, pumpkins, colorful mums, and work. Ew...did I say work? Yeah, I did. It's time for me to get off my butt and return to my profession. It is also time to delete Candy Crush from my tablet. I downloaded the game in May and am on level 103. It look many hours of diligence to get that far. I actually gave up watching television. Crazy? Yes....can I stop it? Uh, can I stop these idiot tears? Answer: I am going to try.
By the way, I have had to stop yoga since I have a bit of elbow tendonitis. This cannot be good. After all, the tendonitis affects yoga and tennis. Could I have gotten it by having my arm up in the air as I played CC? What a dolt! I need a life....time to volunteer and get off the sofa.
It is also time to let go......
Is this post rambling? Yep...sorry...with my brain firing in 90 different directions, I now have a reason for the tears. I am slowly going nuts. Time to go back into the classroom and regain my flow of ideas.
With that said, I have to scoot to work. Peace!
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