Am I dreaming?

Hello! Friday....Friday...Friday! That's it....hot n juicy kind of a day. There are lots of weeds that need to be pulled, but it's waaay too hot. Speaking of too hot, I have tried to get my electrician to fix the outside lights for the past 6 weeks. First excuse: "ground is too hard..." Second excuse: "too wet"...Next excuse: "get the bushes trimmed so I can get back there..." Today's excuse: "too hot..." Dude, do you only work when the weather is dry, 72 degree temperatures with a cool but not too cool breeze? 'Cause if this is the case, I am going to electrician school and dumping my college degrees....just sayin'....

On to a bigger problem than the lighting on the outside of the house.....yesterday, the big guy woke up with terrible pain in the left arm and a more terrible reaction. I am not going to give you a blow by blow description, but let's just say that I left for work a few hours early. He was absolutely hostile, salty, and out of his mind. Nothing is right. Everything is wrong. This is the worst....blah blah blah....yeah, that's what it sounded like and I am not kidding. On my way out the door, I admonished him for going from 0 to 60 mph without shifting and considering his options. Frankly, I would not like this kid to be my surgeon when a major artery is nicked with the scalpel. I can see him screaming in the operating room while all of my blood leaves my body.....again....just sayin'....



As I ran out the door, I shouted to him..."Did you call PT?...no.....well....what do you expect?"
"Text Uncle G to see you....." Finally as I sped away in the safety of my vehicle, I considered one last option. And may I say that it was my idea....I called home....call your surgeon and see if he can see you today.

And so, I landed safely at work, and yes, I was more than happy to be there when I received call number 1: "The surgeon will see me today....." Good. This call interrupted my first meeting.



Call number two comes in after call number one (again interrupting my meeting) from dad. I did answer reluctantly and asked if I could return his call after the meeting: "Hurry up..." Why does this lack of planning constitute an emergency for me? Huh? Why?

Having to rush through the rest of the meeting with the explanation that my 21 year kid and his dad cannot go 10 minutes without speaking to me, I returned the call. "We're going to see Dr. M at 1:45." Gotcha....by chance, you really don't need me there....right?

On to meeting two that went very well without any texts, calls or updates.....

Now, I don't want anyone to think that I am self-indulgent, but I finally decided to treat the legs and feet to a pedicure.....Ok, there is more to the story than picking the right color....

The pedicure was to take place at a new place where the women and men sit in easy chairs, lights are dimmed, candles are lit (or actually faux candles), music is low and soothing, and they begin by placing you on an ottoman with your feet in a warm bucket of water, not a whirlpool. Then as you sit there, a woman with strong fingers and hands gives you a shoulder and back message....yep, that's right.....it's just what I needed after months of being on call, resolving problems, worry, and stress...

as I began to relax, the phone goes off....OYE!!!! "Where are you? We haven't been seen yet by the doctor...." My 30 seconds of relaxation evaporated into the bucket of water....."Uh, pedicure time....remember? A year overdue....K?"


Hanging up,  I turned the ringer volume off as she began to massage the legs...when I tell you that this was amazing...I am not lying....relax...relax...relax....ahhhh.....ring...ring...ring...the phone rang through vibration....Ignore it, I say to myself...this is your 10 minutes....ignore it....ignore it....ignore...."OK, now what??"

And my 30 seconds of relaxation was all I needed as the surgeon felt that he could continue to throw and that his tricep was tight....diagnosis: go to Texas....He actually said more, but I don't have enough time to review. Therefore, the trip was on...or was it?

Today he was scheduled to see his PT to discuss therapy and stretches to alleviate the sore tricep....ready, set, go.....the PT examined the kid and shut him down. In other words, no Texas. Sigh....

Here is the breakdown...he has a little strain and his mechanics are screwed up (that's what college coaching will do for ya....). No Texas....come to PT....relearn your mechanics, build your shoulder strength again....oh by the way, according to his surgeon who is the KC Royals pitching doctor, a pitcher is never to lift weights over his head. What has he been doing for the last three years? Answer: Lifting weights over his head. In fact, a good percentage of the team's pitchers have needed surgery in the past few years. And now, we know why.





Where do we stand besides the Land of Ambiguity? Well, he's not headed to Texas until July....going to work out with the therapist....going to see Coach T in Lehigh Valley...going to find a local pitching coach. All this is new information for us as we process the events of the last 48 hours.

Where do I stand? Well, I'd like to place my head in a bucket of warm water rather than my feet, pinch myself, and try to see if all of this is a dream.....

have a great weekend!

July 4th

Happy Birthday America! It's hot and sunny....a perfect day for family and friends to gather to celebrate the 4th. On our way to Dr. G's for a picnic and ping pong tournament. Cupcake is going to make her extended family debut today. I am pretty sure that she will be wearing something red, white, or blue or a combination.

And so it goes....burgers, hot dog eating contest and naturally, the living room ping pong tournament. Yes, the table is still in the living room, so there is no need for any Queen Anne furniture or cherry wood end tables with prints of Van Gogh paintings. Yep, it's already decorated in typical bachelor style including a few red Solo cups in case someone wants to play beer pong....

Moving on....tomorrow, yes, tomorrow is the long awaited day. Yep, the surgeon will or will not give the green light to Buddy. After his appointment, if all goes well, he will be allowed to throw a baseball. Here is comes...the big leftie has already made an appointment for physical therapy at 6pm for his first toss. Dad and I have been invited to the "show". Looking forward to it...sort of...

Why sort of? Well, after I returned to tennis after the surgery, I was rusty, slow, and discombobulated. In other words, I looked like I had never played before....which some of my former partners have accused me of...but nevertheless, if the big kid thinks that he is going to pick up a ball and throw it at 90 miles per hour, then I am going to have to have a sit-down with him and explain the facts of life. After all, it has been 4+ months of keeping the arm in a sling or immobile. The PT has gone well so there are no dounts about his range of motion. The doubts emerge when he erroneously thinks that the first time he is on the mound he is going to throw strikes or a curve ball. In fact, I submit that he is going to bounce the first 100 or so balls then overthrow them to prove a point.

As Tank told me: "The hardest part is not to over do it when you are starting to feel better..." Yes, Tank is right. So tomorrow, I will be there at 6 pm to witness the rise of the phoenix, be encouraging, clap once or twice, take him out to dinner then have a cake celebration. After all, no one has worked harder than him to return. Right now he is at the gym working out for two hous. This guy is committed or should be committed.....Ah, no....he's got a goal. let's watch, support, and cheer him on.

No one stopped our founding fathers from achieving their goal of one nation under God...right? So, why can't Buddy achieve his goal? This is America, right! Right on!

Have a great 4th!

Passion: Good or bad?

Good morning! Another overcast day and my flowers are loving the attention from Mother Nature. Actually, the weeds love it too.

As I mentioned yesterday, one of the pitchers threw a no-hitter on Saturday and was featured on the Top Ten Best Plays countdown on ESPN. When he returned to campus early this morning, he tweeted about the airline losing his luggage and his car was towed. So much for a hero's welcome. And this, my friends, is the reason why life is so amazing. One minute we are feeling as high as a kite and the next minute, we are looking for our underwear in an airport terminal.

Which leads me to consider the phenomenon of emotions. Think about it...emotions are what drives us to set goals. We accomplish the aforesaid goals because we need to or are driven to....In other words, the feelings or emotions that we have are the reason why we get out of bed in the morning, put on our pants, make coffee, and walk up the stairs to work.

 Let's consider the following: why do I write this blog? The answer is complicated, however, what I can divulge is purely the emotion of satisfaction and the need to set the record straight. Why do I have to be accurate in my stories and descriptions? Well, over the years, I have watched my son be misunderstood and had the need to share the real experiences with the world (or the five people who read this blog). Mostly, I have observed and felt a strong maternal angst as he is snarled at, ridiculed, and criticized by his coaches, team mates, and peers. In other words, it is the emotion of a parent standing by who cannot do more than watch....or can she?

Hence, the tell-all, and oh so accurate blog about the little kid who is now growing up and desperately wants to play big league baseball from his mother's perspective. The next point is why is my son so driven to be the best and play a sport that only a few truly succeed in attaining the highest level of play? I honestly cannot answer it, but my sense is that he has a passion for pitching and the sport. And because of this strong emotional attachment to his craft, he will do anything to achieve this goal. When you look at it from a distance, it may seem a bit over the top, yet when you surround yourself by people who have a passion for something, you can see why they work so hard to actualize their life's work.

It seems that the emotions that they have while playing their sport cannot be eclipsed by anything else in life. The drive to make it is far more powerful than anything else in their life including friendships and school work.  To quote California: "Off the field, you are my friend. On the field, I will do anything to take your place in the line up. It is not personal." I believe it. However, this guy can separate competition on and off the field and I wonder if my kid has that capacity right now.  He is incredibly emotional which can be a positive and negative. On the one hand, emotions drive behaviors. On the other hand, emotions can halt behaviors. A person can out think and feel themselves out of competition.

For example (another tennis story, sorry)....when I played tennis, I could sense when a person would be tightening up and their fear of losing would take over. They either worked harder or folded like a cheap suit and I was able to pull out a win or lose because I became overly tense. Why is winning so important? Well, as dad puts it: "Winning would not feel so good if losing didn't feel so bad." This time, he is right. The feeling or fear when a person loses can almost be incapacitating. This can be evident in the work place, card game, or baseball diamond. No true competitor likes to lose, but it is a real emotion that one grapples with on a regular basis.

Why would a person want to put themselves out there in the public day after day with their successes and failures publicized? At this point, I am not sure. Perhaps it is the emotion felt when winning. Maybe it is a passion for the sport and a feeling of accomplishment that cannot be achieved any other way. After all, winning at pinocle does not feel the same as winning a tournament or the World Series. And so it goes....I will continue to chronicle the good, bad, and ugly as well as the emotions that accompany a seemingly endless journey of success and failures, ups and downs, highs and lows, and the drive to pursue a personal and long held goal.

Whew...enough said. Time for work....have a great day.

A Perfect Prediction

A rainy day in the northeast is matching my mood....bleak....quiet....introverted....
Nah...just kidding. I actually like a soaking rain as I witness what the water does to the flowers. Mother Nature is helping me to water the plants....thank you!

I am sure that you have a question: "How was Chimpanzee, the movie?" It's hard to say...I loved the scenery and learning more about the chimp, but the story about Freddy and Scar seemed a bit contrived, yet the reality of the alpha male adopting a motherless chimpanzee was moving. Just a quick fact....chimpanzees use tools to open their nuts and fruits. This is true. I saw it as Oscar's now departed mother grabbed rocks nuts and slammed the nuts with the rocks to open them, like a jungle nut cracker. She also used a twig to gather termites in a rotted piece of wood, then licked them as a delicacy. Fascinating! Once a colleague returned from African trip and handed out delicacies that she brought home. I had to pass on the dried bugs. Although some of my friends tried them, I decided to immediately start my diet, so I had an excuse.

Were we done celebrating Tink's birthday after the movie and lunch with family? Nope...there was more to come. It was "Tink Weekend" as we took her to see the Phantom of the Opera on Saturday in NY. It's been a few years since I was in the city and felt a bit overwhelmed with the numbers of people, pushing, shoving, long lines, and anonymity. As a person who lives in the suburbs, I was startled by the person who shoved me and told me to 'watch where I was going...' Huh? Me? Watch where I am going? Sista', I was watching where I was going because I was dodging the poo, trash, and gum on the sidewalk. I have to look forward too? Do I need to take a course on Walking in New York City 101? If so, I am staying in suburbia and taking a course in horticulture.

Back to NYC, the Phantom was really good, although I did not sit with Tink and Dad. Why not? Ok, again....typical New York story...we arrived in front of the theater in a great deal of traffic at 1:40 for a 2 pm matinee. The car was not moving, so dad let us out while he parked the car and we stood in a very long line and waited and waited for it to move. By the time we got to the door, there were three doors open with three people taking tickets for hundreds of people. Then they yelled at us that the show was starting....Tink and I found our seats but decided a restroom break was in order first, so we waited in another line. When we finally got into the bathroom, there were three stalls (seems three is the lucky number at this theater)...more waiting...show is starting....we run up the stairs and the usher flashes a light on our tickets and curses (NY?). Telling us to stand in the shadows until a scenery change, we waited and then we had one minute to take our seats in the middle of the row. The girl on the end refused to move her purse on the floor so we had to jump over it to move to the next seat...as the man finally stood, he yelled at me that there was only one seat so I could not enter the row. Huh? I have a ticket! So, the potty mouth and cranky usher took me back up the steps and I found an empty seat in the back row and watched the show by myself (which was fine). At intermission, I saw there was indeed a seat next to dad but the patrons on the end of the row only had patience to let Tink through and barred me with a series of pocketbooks and backpacks from finding my paid for seat.

On another note, dad was able to find parking, walk to the theater, hit the restroom and was seated before the show started. What is wrong with this story? Oh, yeah...while he was looking for a parking garage that was going to steal a great deal of money from our bank account, a woman stood in the middle of 44th street on the telephone. She looked at dad and said: "If you hit me, you are going to pay." 'Nuff said...only in New York does parking cost more than a theater ticket and you really do not need to go to Broadway to see a show. New York is pretty much a mini series itself.

How is the big kid doing? Is salty a good description? Last night as we traveled the turnpike to return to the 'burbs...ahhh...he called to report the starting pitcher had thrown a no hitter against a division rival in the Midwest. Rather than be totally thrilled for his friend, he was miffed. "I wasn't there"....OK, I get that. You want to experience these things with the guys. I completely understand it, but please express some kind of congratulations for the guy and team. My goodness, this is huge. Still salty, he predicted in no uncertain terms that he is going to throw a perfect game. Mark the date and time. This is his plan and he will do it and work harder than ever. Then he said that he was happy for the guy, had already sent a congratulatory text, but felt left out.

You know what? He was left out. The team was in another state and he was left out of the travel, games, dug out, and celebration. As a competitor on a team, he was blue and I understand his mood from an athlete's and mother's perspective. However, things like this happen when a person has surgery and rehabs throughout a season. The point is not to be despondent but determined to succeed. He has the physical tools, now he needs to focus on his mental toughness.

And so it goes. There are ups and downs on the road to a perfect game and if the kid says that he is going to do it, then I believe it. Yet, there will be days when he doubts his abilities but I lost those doubts long ago. With determination and preparation and sacrifice, a person can accomplish anything....really...believe....actually...believing is part of the process too.

Got to go...I believe that I need to spend time in the gym to work off the pre- and post- operative weight that I have gained. My tight pants are screaming at me to get going....so, off I go!

Enjoy!

Tink!

Good morning! Happy birthday to the sweetest person in the world:Tink! Tink is my heart and conscience. She is my traveling companion and loves to run to DQ for me for a blizzard or dilly bar. This kid is a person with a big heart and kind soul. There is no one like her in the world, and I am blessed to be her mom. She never complains when we hit the road and travel to see her brother. In fact, she looks forward to the road trips and is a great companion. Tink made me a mom, and my life changed when she entered it. Tink: I love you, baby!

To celebrate her big day, Buttercup, BP Grandmom and Grandpop and I are going to see Chimpanzee! Ok, it took some coaxing to get them to agree to go to this movie...yes, I am buying the tickets....yes, I am buying them lunch....so, they immediately said: "sure! We'll go!" And yes, I know that we are seeing a movie that I want to see, BUT they will like it. I know that they will...I can tell. I know these things. Besides, the length of the movie is an hour and 18 minutes. If someone goes to the bathroom, it will be over by the time that they return to their seats.

What else is going on in the world of BP mom? Well, the big kid is cramming for his finals and it seems that he will finish the first week in May. Consequently, there will be a road trip through the mountains to pick him up. However, before he puts anything into my car, it must be cleaned and disinfected. Last year, Tink developed a sinus infection while she sat next to his gear. No more of that....I will hand him a dust rag and some water. The answer to the next question is: "Yes". Yes, he will moan and complain and not see the big deal. After all, his clothes and gear were fine on the floor of his apartment and bathroom for all of these months, BUT I don't want them in the car or house. In fact, I will drop him off at the laundry mat to have them washed before even a tee shirt crosses the threshold. Am I a germphobe or smart? You tell me....

It will take some time to get accustomed to having both kids in the house for a prolonged period of time. Buddy always talks to his dad to bet on the date when I hit the roof after he does something crazy like leave the refrigerator door open all night as the food spoils or falls asleep on the sofa with chocolate ice cream on his lap that drops to the floor when he turns on his side.....or watches the dog use the house as her personal bathroom because he did not see the need to take her out after 8 hours....or leave no gas in the car when I am late for work.....or ask 900 times what's for dinner? Then he decides to meet the boys at Moes rather than eating my food.....or.....ahhh, there's too much to enumerate. I'll just celebrate my family being intact and our times together. It will be a joy to have him back so that I can text him from the kitchen that dinner is ready once again.

Have a great day!

The long road back

The long road back is beginning in a few weeks and we will see what the big kid is made of....marshmallow or steel.

As he began the process in October, he learned that the body as wonderful as it is, can be fickle. A person has to take care of the machine or suffer consequences as seen with obesity and tooth decay. Returning from an injury for the average person is tough, but for an elite athlete, it can be tougher.

To review, the big leftie had discomfort in the left shoulder that was diagnosed as tendonitis from overuse. An athlete who is being trained by professionals should not develop tendonitis because the trainer is supposed to be watching for strain or technique flaws. Sadly, this was not the case and therefore, the southpaw began to experience pain.

Naturally, he threw through the pain which is not a good idea on any level. Coach T said that he always has pain, but I don't think that Buddy should at his age except for some aches post work out.

And so, he was gradually diagnosed with a capsule and ligament problem and had surgery which so far seems successful. He is still unable to throw, but we are not to be concerned until late summer. The surgeon felt that with the tightening of the ligament, he will add velocity to his fast ball. This is great since I never understood why a guy with his size,training, and work ethic would be losing velocity rather than gaining it. Yet, once the diagnosis was made, it make perfect sense.

The semester is winding down and physical therapy is going to begin. Dad wants to hire a personal trainer to help the kid return to form. As Buddy pointed out during his last visit, his left arm and stomach muscles are not what they had once been. Dang, I have pointed this out on myself for a number of years, but never hired a personal trainer...maybe we can get a two for one deal....although I am not a fan of sit ups, push ups, or squats with Spider-man balls between the knees.

This summer will be eye opening as we watch how dedicated the kid is to getting back to the mound. As his pitching coach pointed out, many guys just throw in the towel after surgery. But he also said that he feels Buddy will be back because of his commitment to the game. Now, if I can only get him to commit to making his bed each morning, cleaning his dirty dishes, walking the dog, closing the house at night, and putting gas in the car, I would name him to the BP mom All Star team.

Have a great day!

Breaking up

Good morning! My day off....wow...not sure what to do (NOT!). First, Tink has to leave for school...then...I am going to make plans!

Had 90 minute physical therapy session with "the Tank." Tank is a 20-something and somewhat new to PT business. He has designed a number of painful and torturous yet effective exercises designed to get me back on the court or at least running up and down stairs again. The exercises have these thick rubber bands that are placed on my calves and thighs then I have to squat and hold a ball between my legs. Getting the picture? Ok, BP mom, he says...."Squat there for 10 minutes, and I will be back after my cup of coffee...." Don't go, Tank...who will pick me up after the rubber bands cut off my circulation and I pass out?

And so, the PT is going well and I actually enjoy the exercises except for the squats....and perhaps the rubber Spiderman ball that I have to squeeze with my knees, sit on, and stare at during the sessions. Why Spiderman? Why not Batman or the Hulk? Maybe Tank is super hero fixated....maybe he is really Peter Parker. Same age, same height as PP....who knows. If I see him climbing walls or squirting silk out of his wrist, then I will have uncovered the truth.

Spoke to the big kid yesterday. He is ready to leave campus and come home. This is quite a change for a guy who could not wait to get there last summer. Although the season will continue into May, he has made plans.

Plan A: leave campus after finals and begin to work and rehab the shoulder.

Plan B: Dewey and Meat are to become his rehab buddies whether they know it or not. Once they return from college, the guys will be throwing, catching, running, and working out with him. Perhaps he had better share this plan with them now.

Plan C: He is not going to contact any of his baseball friends until he finishes rehab. His rationale is complicated yet surprisingly thoughtful. He feels that if he speaks to the guys who continue to play baseball, he will be distracted and despondent. Therefore, rather than make himself crazy, he will tell them that he will talk to them in August.

Plan D: Earn money but not buy a car. Interesting...what guy do you know that does not want a car? Does he secretly think that dad is going to cave in and buy one for him? Dream on, big guy....

Plan E: He will text or call California after he is drafted in June. How does he know California is going to be drafted? Well, there were 20 MLB scouts in the stadium on Saturday watching him pitch a gem of a game. He throws consistently in the 90's and is ready to pack his bags and go. What does this mean for next year's house? Well, that requires another plan.....

Yesterday, he met up with his friend who was once Big Red's girlfriend. Apparently, Red does not like living with LW, Angel, and Buddy. He feels that they are slobs, holding him back, and he needs to move out. Red also admitted to his former girl friend that he does not like any of his room mates which surprised Angel and the leftie.

My take on it is....there are people that can be your friend but may not be compatible room mates. Personalities, temperaments, life styles, food preferences, and so on are so different. Just because you have a laugh or two with this person does not mean that you can live in close quarters without wanting to ultimately throw them off the balcony. In fact, the 6 month rule is applicable here too....you have to know a person at least 6 months to ascertain whether you are or are not room mate material. This is a lesson that one learns on their own as a mom sits back and watches.

I could say: "Hey, what's wrong with my kid? Why don't you like him?" But really, I get it. It might or might not be personal. However, its a lesson that life teaches you and not a parent. Good thing they found out at the end rather than the beginning of their living arrangement. So, the four guys are about to break up. I hope that it is peaceful as they divide their apartment belongings and shake hands good by (or not)....Keep in mind, the sofa and kitchen table are my son's...otherwise, the guys can have whatever they want....

Have a great day!

Chimpanzees

Good morning!

I am taking the next few days off from work to recover from the last 6 months. It has been hectic and somewhat overwhelming, so it is time to catch up on some home projects like cleaning out my office. Not exactly restful, but it needs to be done.

Did you see that there is a movie about to hit the US called Chimpanzee? I am a big fan of Jane Goodall's work. In fact, Ice and I attended a program in which she recalled her years in Africa. I give her lots of 'props' as she and her mother moved into Africa and observed the chimps. Yes, I said her 'mother'.....Jane had her mother living in an African tent with her. I guess in my world she would be called "African mom" or "Chimpanzee mother."

Let's reflect on Mummy Goodall's sacrifice to live in the jungle with her 19 year old daughter. Does this parallel my life? Hardly, however, what some mom's will do for their kids.....I will begin....Janie, a young English girl who did not have a college education and lived at home had a passion for animals. "Mum," Jane began..."It's my life passion to live with animals in Africa. Can I go? Pretty please? I am 19 years old and am firm on my future. I need to do this mum....please oh please."

Mrs. Goodall: "Oh honey, you know that Africa is on the other side of the world and I am sure that your tent will not have running water, a shower, or kitchen. In fact, there will be no WIFI or air conditioning. Perhaps a trip to the zoo or a picture book of A to Z Animals would be more appropriate."

Jane, stamping her foot screams: "No, Mummy, I really really want to go!"

Mrs G. "All right Janie, but I am going with you and that's that. By the way, there are no corner stores to buy your double stuffed Oreos"

Jane: "Oh Mum, I heart you!"

And so, the Goodall girls fly or take a boat to Africa and make history in the jungle. Eventually, Jane was sent home to England by her mentor to attend college and complete her doctorate. I am sure she took remedial and advanced courses like Chimpanzee 101 and 102, Tsetse Flies 310, Avoiding Anacondas Practicum, and Sitting in One Place for Nine Hours and Not Moving Seminar 425. As she completed her studies, she went back to Africa without her mum and changed our view of the chimpanzee forever.

Now, that's a cool story. It seems moms will do anything for their children from living in a tent during monsoon season to moving to Ohio for a few months. They want to make sure that their child achieves their dream, their passion, and goals. Further, their happiness is of the utmost importance, which is why there is a drop in available chicken in our region when my big hero returns home. Gotta make that chicken parm.....

A mother's love is something that cannot be measured but visualized in what they do for their children. Early mornings and late nights, travel to and from games, standing on your head to see them laugh, and sharing private embarrassing stories with them so that they know they are not alone when things go wrong. A mom helps to create and picks up the pieces when things are broken (like a window, vacuum cleaner, vase, frame, or heart). It's part of the job description. Right now, I am pretty happy that we did not have to leave the country to watch the chimps, although I am pretty sure that I would have done it too.

And so, I am off to meet Ice and make plans to see Chimpanzee, the Movie. Maybe we can see it in 3D. That would be cool. And as I watch the movie, I will be thinking about the Chimpanzee mothers, Mrs. Goddall, my mother, sisters, and family members, and friends like Ice, who sacrificed day after day to make sure that their children had safe and loving homes.

Moving plans

Sunday, Sunday, Sunday! The team won the game yesterday and today and moved up in the rankings. The coach won his 200th game with the university and this is a very big deal. Maybe the guys will get the sofa back in the locker room or perhaps the WIFI will be turned back on. Either way, it is a good victory.

Of course, LW closed the game for the win, and I am sure that my son is not only salty but belligerent. He sees the guys doing what he wants to do. He wants to be out on the mound, mowing down the opposition. He wants to spit onto the ground, use salty language, and scare the batters. Unfortunately, this scenario is only played out in his mind as he daydreams in the dugout. Honestly, the kid has to be patient and work with the professionals. Once he is throwing again, there will be no stopping him. But for now, he has to grit his teeth, spit, cuss, and stand in the back ground.

We had a conversation about his house next year. Yeah, that's right...no more apartment living for this guy. He is moving in with Dog, California, and OC. They will all have their own bedrooms, a porch for their ping pong table, and an outdoor grill. Now, that is living....He was making plans for dad to rent a van, help him to move his furniture, carry the clothes, and drive across town. My reply to his logical plan was "nope....not going to happen..."

"Huh?" He responded.

"That's right...not gonna happen. You guys are athletes and have trucks. Your dad is (excuse the expression) a middle aged man. No way is he going to help you guys to move. In fact, I want you to move without even telling him. Show him that you are a guy who now wears big boy pants rather than under roos and no longer need your dad to help you to move." Got it?

I believe I saw his eyes glaze over as he secretly made a plan to include his dad on the move without letting me know the details. However, there is a flaw in this plan, 'cause his pop tells me everything. He would not disappear for a day and not tell me where he is going. So, my son, it is time to take the sofa by the arms and hoist it over the second floor balcony for the Dog to catch. Then you can carry it on your back and put it on California's luggage rack, but dad is not involved. Get it? Got it? Keep it!

Ok, 'nuff said. I have dinner to make and pour a glass of wine. It's happeee hour!

Take care!

Dealing with dad

Hi! It's another beautiful say in the northeast....I can't wrap my head around why I am wearing shorts today. Perhaps it is global warming....or maybe some other natural phenomenon that scientists cannot explain yet. Nevertheless, I am going to enjoy it while I can.

Not much going on in the baseball world. The team has a home stand and lost last night to a division rival. They have two more games this weekend. The game was broadcasted on television as I sat in the bar with the coworkers celebrating our program's re-accreditation, I could not get the waitress to turn on the game or let me order a fish taco. Once I left the celebration, I watched the game at home and caught multiple 3 second glimpses of Buddy spitting sunflower seeds out of his mouth. Grandmom called and asked if the player spitting leaning against the rail was her grandson. Yep, that was him. He has quite a talent as he can spit seeds from the dugout and hit the first base man in the ear. Perhaps, one day, he can earn money displaying this talent all over the world. He could be billed in the Guinness Book of World Records as "The guy who can catapult sunflower seeds so accurately that they can land on a dime." I don't know about you, but I would pay to see such a feat.

This morning we had a nice chat as he waited for the bus to take him to the field to work out. He is ready to come home in three weeks and will leave the team to continue rehab. The team plays until mid May, but he is anxious to get back to business. So he will leave the sunflower seeds, seed spitting contests, leaning against the fence, wearing his Oakley sunglasses looking like a cool dude, and using salty dugout language to return home to his messy room and unmade bed. When he left on Wednesday, he did not tidy the room, so I sealed it off with duct tape. Perhaps he can access it through the window when he returns for the summer...or not. The point is....do not leave your room messier than it was when you returned home. I do not work for him, and have yet to receive a paycheck for cleaning up after him. I have a new philosophy. Your room, your mess, your responsibility....you can deal with your dad.

And so, it is time for me to jump into the car and watch Little A's softball game. She's the shortstop and apparently the fastest 9 year old on the team. Was there a doubt? Not in my mind.

Enjoy the day!

Whew

Wow! Forgive me for not posting but this week went by like the wind. I think that today is Thursday. At work, we have an accrediting team in the office and I have had to put on my "game face" and act smart. This is a chore since I generally like to be clueless and not pay attention. Yet, I have had to dig out of my level of comfort and make intelligent small and large talk. My brain is sore and the visitors do not leave until tomorrow....then....happy hour!

On Monday, the big kid took the bus home for his appointments and removal of his sling. I got a few texts about "sketchy" people on the bus and how he was the only one who graduated kindergarten among the group. Not funny....something he has to learn to deal with....he also joked about feeling threatened. I texted back to him that he has a weapon in his backpack...his pen. Yes, the pen can be a tool and a weapon. You can create wonderful letters and notes with a pen....then when threatened, you can use it as a weapon. Hit the carotid artery with it and your predator will be disarmed. I guess he never watched reruns of McGyver.

We had a 1:15 appointment on Tuesday and sat waiting for over an hour. Doctor walks in....takes a look...moves the shoulder...is pleased with himself and walks out. After the 45 second interaction, we will see him again in 4 weeks. Buddy was taught a few exercises by the physical therapist and we were on our way back home. On Wednesday morning, I dropped him off at the bus terminal and hit traffic. I was afraid that he was going to miss the bus when he boldly said: "You should just drive me back to campus." Uh huh...that's right...we have accreditors in the office, Grandmom's birthday, a desk full of work, irate students, my research study on health care of the homeless and impoverished to catch up on, a swollen postoperative knee that I continue to rehab, and this guy wants a free ride back to campus where he can sit back with his iPod in his ears, take a three hour nap, and I can drive round trip for 6 hours then go to work for 10 hours. Dude...bad week to make that suggestion....your timing was not good on this one...Greyhound looks better and better for his trips to and from campus. For safety measures, I will buy him a few extra Bic pens for his journeys.

Yesterday we celebrated BP Grandmom's birthday with the usual family fanfare....with pizza, cake, the Flyers game on in the kitchen and Phillies game on in the family room. Between shouts, screams, and high fives, G-mom's big day was celebrated in style. It was comfortable and the way the family gets together...very informal, yet fun and meaningful with the dog vomiting under the table (ew). Grandmom has created a home that we all return to on a regular basis. One of the 6 of us can be found at the kitchen table at any time eating, chatting, or reading the paper. It is the way that I want my children to view our home....as a haven...a place of safety, conversation, laughs, and joy with lots of good food and memories. This comes from the top as Grandmom and Grandpop have an open door policy and we certainly have no problem walking through it. Each of us does the same thing after we walk into the house....we greet the folks, walk into the kitchen and open the refrigerator door. It is automatic as we look for homemade soup and pasta. We are never disappointed (unless Big G gets there first, then the fridge has been cleaned out).

And so, it's time to go to work and act intelligent. Whew, I am going to need a vacation after this week....yep...go to find an inexpensive place to go where I can turn off the brain....stop thinking...look at some nature....and drink a Merlot. Actually, the back yard qualifies as the perfect place.....have a great day and Happy Birthday Grandmom!

Easter bliss

Whew! It's the day after Easter...what a beautiful day and wonderful time with family. The last thing that I wanted to do after Buttercup's shower was to have family over (no offense). I was tired, sore from surgery, running around the country with Buddy, his surgery, work, and so on....I was tired and burned out. But it took 24 hours after the shower to generate the energy to host the party. Then it happened....

Everyone came together to help with the event. This is what family is all about...not leaving one tired person to do the work, but coming together to decorate, cook, prepare the food, and contribute to the success of the day. Buttercup, BP Grandmom and Grandpop came to the house on Saturday to help to create the fruit and pasta salads, potato au gratin, and pineapple stuffing. Big Sis, Dr G, Uncle C, the Saints, and Scooby, brought dishes too that added to the day. Without their help, I would be still cutting up a cantaloupe as hungry family members stared at me looking for something edible while watching the Phils lose and Bubba win the Masters. All in all, it was a perfect weekend.

OK, on to one of my favorite subjects...the big kid. Remember yesterday when I went on a BP mom rant about Angel falling into a depression rather than "sucking it up" and being a man among boys? Well, the angelic one was the hero yesterday. It was the bottom of the 9th (the guys were playing at home) with two outs and the game was tied. There was a man on second base and Angel was batting. With all his might, he slammed a walk-off double to win the game for the team. Yeah Angel! Now, this is what 'I'mtawkinabout!' The kid was fearless and did not need a magic cupcake. Pretty soon, I am going to be out of the cupcake business since the guys do not need them anymore.

By the way, the big kid is taking the bus home today for his post surgical appointment and first physical therapy session. Dad is peeved with the bus line. It seems that since he made the reservation with his credit card, he was charged an extra $18.00. When Buddy shows up today without the credit card in his hands, he will be charged another $15.00 on top of the fare and additional fee. Dad is exhausted and now he is peeved with the bus company. Oy...look out! It seems that the bus lines that advertise $1.00 fares sell only one seat at that price. So, when you call for that dollar fare, you land up with a seat on the roof with a harness at a rate that is comparable to taking US Air home.

OK, time for me to work. Enjoy the beauty of the season. I have a few deadlines that I have avoided this weekend. Peace-out!

Easter and Passover

Happy Easter! It's a beautiful day and the BP family is coming over for brunch. Naturally there are lots of preparations. Yesterday, I was joined by BP grandparents and Buttercup as they dove into the cutting and chopping of fruits and vegetables for the party. We have food....lots of foods...an overabundance of food....I hope that people come with their appetites...they usually do, especially Big G, my 16 year old nephew who can eat his entire family's weight in food. A growing boy, football and rugby player..the kid is always hungry! His mama's food bill must be huge!

Anyway, another shout out to Sparky and the Baker. I never saw two people work so hard creating pastries in my life. Sparky made over 1000 macaroons and I think that I ate 999 of them...kidding...half of one is enough to feed Big G for a couple of days. Lines were out the door at the bakery and they had a refrigerated truck in the front with all of the orders. Celebration of Easter and Passover created quite a number of orders as the employees never stopped moving in a week's time. The Baker and Sparky worked all night and 18 hour shifts. I would have fallen asleep in my matzo crunch batter. Now they are off to a well earned and deserved vacation....dreaming of chocolate bunnies and lamb cakes.

How is the big kid? Well, this is the first Easter that we are not together. And I am surprisingly OK with it. I still filled his basket knowing that he is coming home tomorrow after class for a follow up surgical appointment and the start of physical therapy.

The team is on a four game winning streak but still very far from .500 with such a bad start. He is feeling a bit better about sitting on the bench. Last night, he stayed in and ate ice cream and watched a movie. After the coach's meltdown, he was not going to chance being seen at a party the night before a game. Wise decision, my son....wise decision.

Apparently, Angel has lost his starting job in the outfield and is in a funk. Also, his girl friend is headed to Europe for the summer, so it has added to his misery. Shall I give him the BP mom diatribe? Huh? OK, here is goes.....

Dude! You lost the job because you were outperformed. Are you going to sit on the bench and be miserable or work your butt off to regain your rightful status in the outfield...a freshman? Come on kid! Do I have to make you some cupcakes or are you going to pull yourself up by your cleats, put your head down, and work out the kinks in your game? You have what it takes to get your job back, so stop whining and get moving! As far as your girl friend is concerned, she has earned her trip to Europe. Rather than feeling sorry for yourself that she is leaving, give her props for going. That's right! This is a once in the lifetime trip...do not give her a guilt trip when she should be happy making preparations to leave...oy! MEN!

Wow, that made me feel better...how about you?

Enjoy your day....Happy Easter and Passover!

Macaroon Princess

Good morning. Did you know that if you spill a liquid like coffee onto your key board, it will short out? I just learned the hard way....oy! Now I need a new key board for my computer. I had to borrow one to finish my work.

What is going on this Good Friday? Well, I survived my shift in the bakery and have a renewed respect for anyone in this type of business. Let me tell you, this group moved like the wind, make hundreds of baked items, ordered a refrigerated truck to store additional ingredients and orders, and never stopped....I left after 6 hours and they worked late into the night. I believe that I had frosting on my bottom and chocolate on my shoulder (late night snack for BP mom).

So, BPM, what did you do at the bakery? Well, I did whatever would not destroy the quality and quantity of what was being mass produced. In other words, I helped with the macaroons. Sparky had cornered the market as the macaroon queen and I believe I earned the title of macaroon princess as I dipped hundreds of tasty perfectly made macaroons in melted chocolate and drizzled chocolate designs on top. I created several macaroon drizzled prototypes with the chocolate. For example, there was the butterfly design not to be confused with the honey bee or puppy dog. I had a few stars and moons as well as abstract art in which the buyer will have to determine what he or she sees in the design. Once again, I have great respect for all business owners and will keep my job....but help out whenever the call is made. By the way, happy Passover and Easter to all!

Dang! I just spilled the coffee again! Rats, what is my problem today? Glad I did not spill anything at the bakery, although my clothes were like food magnets as they picked up flour, frosting, chocolate, and coconut.

What's up with the big kid? Well, he is one happy guy. Over 400 hundred students took the math test this week with a class average of 60. My son scored a 100% along with two other students. Hmmmm....I say to him, did you look at the right place? Was your name spelled right? Really, you did not get anything wrong? Really, you got everything right? Really? Mama is proud of her boy! He wants to frame the grade. I am right there with him as I have already picked out a frame.

Why are we so excited about a 100% in a math grade? Well, it brings his average that was sitting in the basement up to the second level of the high rise and his self esteem has exploded. You see, BPM and her BP son are not math scholars and need calculators to make change. So, when one of us has earned a quantitative achievement, we celebrate with a special dinner and cake!

And so, I have a big project to finish before I leave the house today. Have a wonderful day....

Five minutes

God morning! I am on the run today since I have physical (not mental) therapy in 20 minutes. And after pt, I am headed to the Baker's bakery to fill matzo crunch orders. What is matzo crunch? I don't know...never saw one or ate one, but I will be filling the orders today.

The bakery's busiest seasons are Easter, Christmas, and May. It gets so crazy with orders, that they fill a large truck in the front of the bakery with the orders and people pick them up from the truck and not in the store. it is amazing. Last night Sparky and the Baker did not get home until 3 am and they started again this morning filling the abundance of orders.

So, how do I feel about not getting a job at Starbucks in Ohio BUT asked to help out at the bakery? Pretty darn good! Starbucks can drop in the ocean for all I care....ooppps. I did not mean to say that 'cause I have to stop there before I start my matzo shift. Sorry...sometimes I get a little cranky that I was not even granted an interview let alone offered a job.

And so, off I go....have a great day.

Time and parties

It's Holy Week...where has the time gone? Usually, I am making plans to take a trip to a baseball field somewhere in the US. However, things are different this year with Buddy on the bench embracing the red shirt. I have had more time to accomplish goals and tasks, yet I am no where near catching up. I guess that I can do a time analysis of my days but, I don't have the time to analyze my time. Now, I know that that does make sense.

Let's chat about "embracing the red shirt." What does that mean? Well, the red shirt is a NCAA term of not playing a season yet being a member of the team. He cannot travel but he can be in the dugout and bench and participate in workouts, team meetings, and activities. Since he is red shirted, he retains his eligibility for another year meaning he will leave college after five years rather than four. Hopefully, he will leave his 5th year with a graduate degree. This would be an ideal scenario. Is it realistic? Hope so...it makes sense from an academic and financial sense. I am not sending him to college for a 5th year to major in partying....

I have nothing against parties, since I enjoy them myself...going to have the family over for Easter....so, I like parties...but I don't like the way that they make me feel the day after the party.

Do I mean 'hangover'? Yep, I do. However, I have a theory on hangovers. Over the years, I have had time to ponder the phenomenon and will share my hangover theory today for those of you who need something to consider as the spring party season begins to accelerate.

The following levels of hangovers have been postulated by BPM. An avid researcher, devoted to the scientific process, I have generated a three tiered hangover theory that has been eagerly accepted by my contemporary peers.

Level 1: the mood is giddy. Everyone has a buzz. No one is impaired and partier can safely drive home when their alcohol level is below the legal limit.

Level 2: Dancing and singing off key to old Rolling Stones and Monkees songs set the stage for this level. As the singing continues, the partier realizes that someone should take their car keys. Next day side effects include a mild headache, nausea, and bitchiness.

Level 3: the partier asks “how did I get home? Did I go out last night? Why do I feel like a train hit me?” The following day, the partier is heard to say, “I will never, ever drink again” Side effects include severe grouchiness, stiff joints, puffy eyes, and a headache that could kill a buffalo.

Yes, I have had a multitude of opportunities to observe this phenomenon and after one bout of Level III, a person hangs up their bar stool and finds other activities such as gardening and knitting to occupy their time. Do I advocate drinking? Nope, this can lead to accidents and taking the life of an innocent person. if a person is going to party, please do it safely...have a designated driver, stay overnight, or leave hours after your last drink. I may joke, but drinking and driving is not a laughing matter. Don't do it. Stay safe or stay off the road.

Speaking of which, time to get some real work done. Have a great day!

Moving on

Good morning! What a beautiful day! Wow....

I would like to send a shout out to my invisible friend,T. Connected through e-mail by a mutual friend two years ago, I have been editing her papers and dissertation on Black female CEOs in corporate America. She has worked unbelievably hard. Last week the dissertation was due and she and I were typing, editing, typing, and editing until the last second. Then she hit click to send the 300+ page document to her committee. She defended last Thursday and bingo! She is now Dr. T. I send her my heartfelt congratulations and thank her for the opportunity to learn more about being a black female in the corporate world. It is not easy and they often hit the glass ceiling. With advocates like Dr. T, things will turn around for this population of women very soon. I feel like I am an honorary black woman in corporate America. Many thanks to Dr. T for giving me the opportunity to learn and figuratively live the quests of the women that she chronicled in her research. Look for the movie soon, 'cause the information that she detailed is compelling and sometimes unbelievable (yet real).

OK, on to the big kid.....I don't know anything. Honestly, my three-four a day telephone calls have disappeared. According to dad, he has found the library and is working diligently to catch up post surgery. At least he is communicating with his father. I think that there is a big math test coming up, so he is crunching the numbers.

I must say that I am really proud of him for finding out that the big building in the center of campus is the library and open all hours of the day and night. I spent many hours on the third floor of my library in college. I am not a naturally intelligent nor gifted student, so I had my own table. I sat there so many hours that I felt like I had splinters in my bottom. Actually, I did get a splinter from the table when my thigh brushed against the bottom of the table. I could not remove it for years. When it finally came out, it was over an inch in length. Ouch!

And so, Buddy is going to catch up because he is dedicated and wants to demonstrate that he can and will earn honors! Kudos to my son.

This is a short installment since I have to run (yeah...sure) to physical therapy. My first appointment is today and I am hoping to return to 100% in a few weeks.
Gotta run...way to go, Kentucky....lost that pool in the office....oh well...I also lost the $650 million....

Go forth....

Once again, I have been absent from writing. And I apologize. I had to work on Saturday. Sunday was a different story as we celebrated my goddaughter's future child at a baby shower. Buttercup is supposed to give birth to a girl. Everything was pink down to the napkins, decorations, cake, and gift wrapping. Hmmm...she received loads of adorable clothes that I wish that I could wear (even the cute little socks and zebra striped sneakers)....but...the questions remain: what if the ultrasound is wrong? What if she is really having a boy? She now has thousands of dollars worth of girl clothes plus an adorable pink convertible that Big M gave her. Stay tuned....estimated date of arrival is early May.

OK, on to the most wonderful yet grouchy kid in the mountains.... I am less miffed with him since I have had time away from his self-indulgent (yet realistically earned) 'woa-is-me-isms'. Granted, he is not playing baseball this year BUT he has three more years of eligibility to grow and hone his game. He can concentrate on his studies and even earn a master's degree while playing baseball. This is the American dream....no room for sadness or self-doubt. It's time to mature, focus, and start rehab. He has been blessed with the best of all. He has been given the best chance to return to form. he had the best surgeon in the country. He is in one of the best schools in the country. What's the problem?

Message to the big leftie from BP mom:

Son, you have so many things going for you. You have height, great athleticism, and are pretty darn good looking...hey, your hair is one of the "looks" that you started in your school. There is no room for sadness or worry. You have all the tools to return to the team. Your confidence and work ethic have gotten you this far. Pick yourself up by the cleats, dust yourself off, and start the road back to the pitching mound. Furthermore, you have the support of family, friends, and coaches. If anyone can come back better and stronger...it's you. No pity parties....no more "no one understands..."....none of that. Put your head down and keep going. We will be there to support you. I have a safety net that I have used over the years and will continue to pull out until I draw my last breath.

Hang in there. You can do it...make it...be the person that you are destined to be. Go forth and conquer!!!

Just a good ole boy

Ahhh! Sorry that I have not written but I have been WORKING! Yep, work...a little four letter word. I actually love my job, but it can get in the way of things that I like to do during the day. Lately, I have been editing my friend's 300+ page dissertation on black female CEOs in the corporate world. Did you know that there is only 1 black female CEO on the Fortune 500 list? Why, you may ask? I am not going to tell you. Once T successfully defends her research, we are going to convert it to a book, go on the Piers Morgan show, and have Tyler Perry make a movie about this population. Yep, I am thinking B-I-G. Maybe, we'll be invited to the White House....better yet....Oprah...yep...Oprah....

Ok, enough dreaming....what is going on with the big kid? Lots! and not so much....he cannot travel with the team so he has to be content sitting in the bullpen at home games. he still works out his cardio and helps around the dug out and field. other than that, he is on the fringe. And let me tell you, it's a good thing....

Without him, the pitching staff has blown multiple games. The hitters are not hitting. And the coach almost blew an aneurysm. During the last post, I shared with you how he screamed for four hours. The next day, the guys walked into the locker room and everything was missing...the big screen television, ping pong tables, lounge chairs, and sofas. And the WiFi was turned off! Boy, does he mean business. Buddy was not pleased and we had to talk him off the ledge. After all, there is absolutely nothing that he can do to help this year and he feels powerless and a bit snarky.

The team left for Indiana yesterday and three of the Saturday night partiers were left on campus. oops! The next time they schedule a big party, they had better consult with the baseball schedule first. This coach means business. I once thought that he was like a good old boy on The Dukes of Hazzard....those days are gone. He does have quite a temper...yikes.

It's a no-party zone on campus now. I guess that the guys will be in their dorm rooms early this weekend and perhaps doing homework or reading the Bible. After all, they might all be praying for a miracle to turn their season around and return to the coach to his salty former self. Or maybe they can find a genie in a bottle and get three wishes...Oh genie...I wish for a more laid back coach, an arm that can throw 90 mph and the WIFI to be turned back on in the locker room.

Have a great day

Good Morning! It's a crisp day in the northeast and the pretty spring flowers do not know what hit them. The weather until now has been almost summer like. The question that I pose is: "Is this global warming?" Hmmmm...perhaps....then again....probably not.

Ok, where do we stand today (ha...a little pun). The knee feels better each day and the swelling is going down. I am pretty sure that I do not need the crutches anymore, although today is Sparky's birthday party. We begin with happy hour then head out to a restaurant for dinner. I am thinking that I should bring the crutches, not for me...but for Sparky who might need some help standing up after her celebration. The Baker, my new pal, is baking different types of cakes based on each guest's preference. My favorite is carrot cake. Once I had a piece of her carrot cake and I immediately went into a sugar coma that lasted several hours. I am not sure what happened but I remember being breathalyzed for sugar intoxication. I was way over the limit of a normal sugar-licious blood level.

Got an early morning call from Buddy who is back in college and beginning to feel the effects of a full course load. He called to complain that he is not getting any sleep and that he does not know if he can make it through the week. So what does BP mom do?

I'll tell ya.....I did not let him complain any more and I took over the conversation:

"Hey, you live for this type of challenge...there's nothing that you cannot do...this is the life of a college athlete....you have the tools to succeed...go out and crush this exam...start to keep a list and check off each activity....by doing that you will feel a sense of accomplishment....now get going...make a difference....you can do it....buh buh"

Think that my pep talk worked? Uh...not sure, but at least I did not give him the opportunity to complain about his life that every man and boy would love to have. He has it all...no complaints...you can be tired, but this is a no whining zone!

Speaking of pep talks, Buddy was in rare form last night as he shared how the coach went ballistic at yesterday's practice. Think of every four letter word that you know...string them into a few sentences...add venom, anger, and a shot of apoplexy and you have a four hour screaming session. Yep...all through practice, Coach screamed at the guys...drinking, being late, not caring, not giving 100% and messing with his livelihood. The man is angry. So what happens? I dunno...let's stay tuned to the next game to see if the guys show more energy, because as of now, their "butts are on the line...." and before the coach loses his job, he will cut them from the team. Yikes!

Time to go and get some work done...got a few deadlines too. Have a great day!