Thursday, March 12, 2015

Customer service

Good morning. It is my last day in the south and I leave this afternoon. I will miss the weather but am very salty about the way things finally turned out. You see.....

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I have been staying in the Southern Belle's home and working to create an environment that is a bit more updated to accommodate a different life style. I ordered a desk, cleaned out closets, reconfigured space, and ordered a sofa bed. The sofa bed came in last Friday and looked comfie. On Monday, I wanted to open it and air out the mattress, when it happened....or rather did not happen....

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I could not pull the bed out of the sofa thereby changing the name from sofa bed to sofa. I called the store and customer service and began a process that began with "Hello, how are you today" and ended with "Where the %&#B)(% is your $#&*% customer service???!!!"

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Fade to black.....

On Monday....

"No, ma'm, we cannot come out to fix the sofa until April..."

Huh? No, I am leaving on Thursday, will be out of town for two must come on Wednesday...."

"No ma'm. We cannot possibly do this?"

Deep breath....OK, then you can come now and take the sofa back.

Image result for broken sofa bed gif

"Just a minute ma'm, I will check with my manager."

Do that, missy....OK, I did not call her 'missy', I said 'thank you.'

"Ma'm, someone can come out on Wednesday. We will call you on Tuesday."

OK, now we are talking. On Tuesday, I got the call....."Ma'm, someone will be out between 8 am and noon."

Hmmm...not going to work, I am out of town. Afternoon please.

"Ma'm, the schedule has already been made. We cannot change it."

All right. Have someone pick up the defective sofa bed.

"Ma'm, someone will be out between 2:30 and 4:40."

Thank you....

I think that I used my northern tendencies to make this one happen. Are we done yet? Is the sofa now a bed too?

Let me continue......

It is now 4:45 pm on Wednesday and I had a 5 pm meeting scheduled. Ok, it was happy hour with a new friend, but I could not contact her to tell her that I was backed up, so I called customer service.

"Ma'm, someone will be there between 5p and 6:30p."

No! Your people told me that they would be here between 2:30 and 4:30.

"Well, ma'm, we can reschedule. How about April......"

NO! Tell the techs to come to the house after 6pm.

"OK, ma'm, the tech will be there at 6:22p."

Great. I have a meeting (OK, happy hour) between 5 and 6 and I will be back at the house by 6:10.

After rushing through a glass of wine or actually drinking it like a shot, I ran back to the house and sat....and sat...and sat some more.....

It was 7:41...."ma'm, the tech is in traffic and will be delayed."

That's an understatement, donchathink?

I continued to sit...not face on.....

At 8:00p..."ma'm, I am calling to reschedule your appointment for April."

"Cuse me, but what happened to 'he's on his way?'

"Ma'm, he was there."

Huh? Oh no he wasn't. I have been sitting here all day except for an hour. No one was here. He's lying.

"Ma'm, do you have double glass doors? he took a photo at 6pm. No one answered the door."

WHAT!? He was supposed to be here at 6:22! I could not make that time up. it was so random! Plus, he was 22 minutes early AND 4 and 1/2 hours late AND now you are telling me that you are rescheduling for April???? Where is my customer service? Where is my sofa bed?

Here is what you do....tell them to pick up this defective sofa right now. I no longer want it (OK, I actually do since I like it except it does not work). I think that I was a bit 'postal' on this call.

Manager! I want a manager....waiting ten minutes for the manager.....I let her have it. Yes, I was wrong. I should not have raised my voice to a woman who was just doing her job but the frustration mounted and exploded like a volcano. I continued to vent and apologize...vent and apologize...vent some more....Pick up the sofa. Done!

"Ma'm, we can exchange the sofa."

Great. Tomorrow morning. Let's move on it since I am leaving.

"Ma'm, the schedule has been created and I cannot promise you anything. But I will call you at 9 am tomorrow (it is 8:45 now.....will she actually call me at 9am? What do you think?).

As I calmed down a bit, I started to reflect. What the heck happened that I lost my cool with a perfect stranger. That's not me. I am pretty calm in even the worst storms. Then I realized that this customer service was calling the shots, not following through on promises, and left me sitting on a chair (not sofa) powerless. It is not a good feeling.

As someone who deals with students and customers in general, I would never deliberately deliver a faulty product. And I stand up for quality. If I say that I am going to do something, then I do it. On the other hand, the telephone schedulers are at the mercy of a flawed system and have to stand between the faulty processes and irate customers (me).

Feeling guilty, I need this woman to call me in 15 minutes, if not, I will run to the CVS minute clinic, claim that I have high blood pressure, take the medication to prevent a hypertensive episode and stroke.

******......It is now 9:45 call is on.....sitting here....waiting....getting older....crankier.....crankier......


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